Sabbath Rest
Faith friends, companions on the journey, brothers and sisters in Christ --
Thank you for hearing and granting my request for a Sabbath rest. Many of you have affirmed my choice to ask and our leadership’s choice to grant this Sabbath. A few have asked questions based out of your concern for me. Many have expressed a desire to have the same kind of rest in their own life. So, I thought I would offer a response, as best I can, in this week’s blog.
Anyone who holds a position of decision-making responsibility right now knows what a painful season the pandemic has been. If you are a parent, you know your children don’t have the same risk-management scale that you have. If you are a teacher, you know the families of your students treat exposure and its risks differently than you do -- and differently than each other. If you are a boss, a mayor, a school board member, a public health official, a hospital administrator...this has been an exquisitely painful season. I am not alone in the pain of decision-making or the loss in wanting what I cannot have right now. Yes, part of my request is in response to the exhaustion of living through a pandemic.
But, a bigger part of my request is in response to restlessness in my soul. I feel like God wants my undivided attention to work through my call, the vision I have for our life together, and some writing I feel led to engage more deeply. In a normal season, I would be able to carve out this space without stepping away from my duties as your pastor. But, I haven’t had a normal season in a little over 2 years. During that time, we’ve faced painful fissures in our congregation due to General Conference 2019, major staff turnover, and fear around denominational identity. Also during that time, I chaired the Board of Pension and Health Benefits for our Annual Conference and faced many leadership decisions in which there are no good options. And, last year, I was elected to serve as a delegate to the General Conference and Jurisdictional Conference -- which are still in front of us.
My soul cannot process all of this in the midst of day-to-day demands. Through God’s providence, God provided a gift called Sabbath, commanded that we observe it, actually. We are not made to be “on” all the time, friends. There is an inhale, but there better be an exhale. There is work, but there better be rest. And so, it is time for me to exhale for a few months.
Many have asked what I’m going to do while I’m away. The truest answer is, “I don’t know.” The best answer is, I’m trying not to set expectations so that I can better lean into God’s leading. I have a few days away planned at a house on Grand Lake that is owned by the Oklahoma United Methodist Foundation. They make it available for clergy retreat. Kurt and I have a trip planned the first week in January. One of our members gave me access to 10 acres near Kellyville that is just open land. I would imagine I will be outside as much as I possibly can. I will let my time be unstructured except for morning and evening prayer. I will exercise. I will spend more time with my parents and go to OKC to spend time with Elizabeth. I will spend time in silence. Silence is a balm for me when I feel weary. It helps me quiet the other noise in my soul and creates a safe place for me to connect with God.
I honestly don’t know what the coming 2 months will hold. They feel like a gift that I’ll be opening and discovering with each new day. For all of you who have assured me of your prayers, please know how grateful I am. Be assured of mine for you while I am away. The staff and I have worked through the daily and weekly duties I hold to make sure there are no critical gaps. There will be gaps -- they know that and I know that -- but hopefully not critical ones. I’m glad you will get a chance to meet Rev. Mark Rickman. He is a long-time friend and colleague in ministry. He’ll be assisting Pastor Heather, particularly on Sunday mornings. And, knowing that Heather is alongside you makes this possible. I owe her so much for the wonderful partner she is in ministry. I will always be grateful that she saw the need for this in my life before I did and has constantly chided me into taking it ever since.
May God lead you through a blessed Advent season. May God hold each of you closely as you are seeking your own renewal in different ways. May God use this time of Sabbath rest to restore our congregation and remind us of our mission, “Inviting people to Christ-centered service.”
I’ll see you this Sunday, Nov. 15, and next, Nov. 22. Looking forward to our time of worship together.
